Latest Short Funny Whatsapp Status Quotes: Best Collection Of Funny Status Updates In English For Whatsapp, Facebook And Social Messengers

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@ I talk to myself because i like dealing with a better class of people.
@ I think it’s wrong that only one company makes the game Monopoly.
@ When inspiration does not come to me, I go halfway to meet it.
@ Winter as Hell – I ordered a pizza and the messenger comes with a Jet …
@ Women have magic wand…they can turn anything in an argument.
@ X thinks that 100-calorie packs have just enough cookies to piss me off!!
@ Anyone knows my Instagram username not making a new account again.
@ Bitch, the only test you have passed in your life is pregnancy test.
@ Boys are like purses, cute, full of crap, and can always be replaced
@ Girls, if he only wants your breasts, legs, and thighs. send him to KFC.
@ Gravitation cannot be held responsible for people falling in love.
@ Had a really great “Night Out” last night, According to my police report.
@ I always dream of being a millionaire like my uncle!… He’s dreaming too.
@ I am always right, Once i thought that I am wrong, But i was wrong.
@ I have enough money to last me the rest of my life, unless I buy something.
@ I have some 2-3 real friends, the rest are just people I socialize with.
@ Congratulations!!My tallest finger wants to give you a standing ovation.
@ Currently working towards an MBA with an emphasis in fantasy football
@ Dear Lord, there is a bug in your software...it's called #Monday, please fix it
@ Did anyone else notice the sound if you click the like button on my status?
@ Diet rule #1: If nobody sees you eating it, it doesn’t contain any calories.
@ Doing nothing is very hard thing to do…you never know when to finish
@ Don’t drink and drive. You might hit a bump and spill your drink.
@ I’m Jealous Of My Parents… I’ll Never Have A Kid As Cool As Theirs!
@ I’m not afraid of going to hell because all my friends will be there
@ My opinions may have changed, but not the fact that I am right.
@ Never cry for that person who doesn’t know the value of your tears
@ Not every goodbye is painful like a ”goodbye class” from teacher!!
@ Not to get technical, but according to chemistry alcohol is a solution.
@ Nothing in the world is free, even Santa comes with a ‘Clause’.
@ Of course I talk to myself..as sometimes I need expert advice !!!
@ People try to bring you down if and only if you’re above them.
@ When I actually die some people are going to get really haunted.
@ When I am happy I smoke to rejoice, when I am sad I smoke to conceal.
@ Don’t get a man(woman) ,get a dog …they are loyal and they die sooner.
@ Don’t kiss behind the garden, Love is blind but the neighbors are not.
@ Don’t think for a second that I actually care what you have to say
@ Don't kiss behind the garden, Love is blind but the neighbors are not.
@ I stopped fighting my inner demons because now we are on the same side!
@ I stopped fighting with my inner demons. We are on the same side Now.
@ I tried to be normal once. Wasted and Worst two minutes of my life.
@ I’m going to update my status….but better you focus on your own.
@ I thinks my neighbor just caught me stealing his Wi-Fi internet.
@ When I feel a little down, I put on my favorite high heels and dance
@ When I was born, I was so surprised that I didn’t talk for two years!

Hopefully, this Latest Short funny Whatsapp Status Quotes may helpful to you and these statuses may flexible to your social messengers.


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